My chart is not helping my phantom symptoms...

So, for the last 10 days or so, my boobs have been killing me, I am literally throwing up almost everyday and on the verge of it most of the day, I am moody, I am tired, and of course my mind plays tricks on me. I have been schooled enough to understand that these are simply phantom symptoms. When you WANT to be pregnant, every single thing that you feel that is outside of "normal" for you, will lead you to believe you are pregnant.

My chart does not help this theory...take a look....

From last cycles chart to this one.....this looks beautiful. According to this, I am sitting at 17 dpo. With no sign of AF. At all. My cycles have been a bit irregular since coming off of BC with one of my cycles being 36 days and another being 24 days. Right now I am sitting at 37 days. Cant draw a conclusion based on that. Last cycle my temps were ALL over the place. Up, down, up down. Awful. Look at my chart now. After O, not a single temp below coverline. So I did what any logical girl would do.

I tested.

What a surprise.

BFN.

Nothing.

Not even a slight hint of a line.

At 17 dpo.

If by Monday there is still no AF, and still getting BFN's, I am calling my dr. Sigh...this is so frustrating.

I feel like I dont have the right to complain because this is really just the 3rd cycle. There are girls who are in cycles 9,13,18 and are still being "tricked" every month. I didn't post on the bump about it because I am still so "new" to the waiting game. I feel for the girls who go through this month after month after month. It makes me not feel sorry for myself at all. These women spend months getting their timing right, using OPK's, drinking green tea, eating pineapple core. Only to be disappointed month after month. Or worse. Finally get pregnant, and then m/c. I feel for them.

I just wonder if that's going to be me. Did the years and years of being on the depo shot plague me into being one of the ones that has to wait a year or longer? Will I be one of the girls sitting at cycle 18 listening to some girl complain that she didn't get pregnant on her first cycle? God, how heart wrenching that must feel.

In any case- as it stands right now, I know absolutely nothing other than the fact that I am 17 dpo with a beautiful chart, yucky phantom symptoms, and no AF.

Just another day in my life!

Vent over, thanks for listening.